ऊपर शेरवानी अंदर परेशानी !

ऊपर शेरवानी अंदर परेशानी : My quick take on SLB’s “Heeramandi” (Netflix)

Step right up, ladies and gentlemen, and behold the grand spectacle that is "Heeramandi: The Diamond Bazaar"! Netflix's latest offering promises opulence, glamour, and a dash of sepia-toned nostalgia reminiscent of your grandmother's photo album.

Picture this: Sanjay Leela Bhansali, the undisputed king of extravagant sets and lavish frames, unleashes his artistic prowess once again, meticulously handpicking every pixel to create a visual feast that could rival Versailles itself. Move over, "Versailles," (web series) there's a new kid in town, and it's called "Heeramandi" – where every frame is a potential wallpaper and every scene a masterclass in set design.

But alas, dear audience, beneath the glossy facade lies a tale as thin as a fashion model's waistline. If you're expecting the A-list glamour of Alia, Kareena, or Deepika, prepare to be disappointed – this cast feels more like a rehab for 'out of circulation' stars, with no marquee names to set the screen on fire.

However, fear not, for Monisha , Sonakshi, and Aditi rise from the ashes like phoenixes, seizing their golden opportunity to shine amidst the sepia-toned splendor. But where are the men, you ask? Lost in a sea of hit-and-miss roles, reminiscent of forgotten 'item girls' in a Bollywood masala flick.

And oh, the audacity of Mr. Bhansali – writer, director, music director, editor, all rolled into one! But alas, in his quest for cinematic glory, he serves up a mishmash of flavors that leaves us craving the simplicity of a humble dal khichdi instead of Mughalai Biryani.

Sure, there are stylized montages, beautiful music, and choreography that would make even the gods weep with envy. But beware, dear viewer, for you'll be waltzing through a whopping eight-plus hours of style over substance, longing for a "Mughal-e-Azam" or “Pakeeza” moment but landing squarely in "Gajakamini" territory. 😜

So, if you're in the mood for a visual extravaganza that's all sizzle and no steak, "Heeramandi: The Diamond Bazaar" awaits – just don't forget to pack your patience and a pillow (you may need it badly) 😜